


Perfection

by somedayoneday



Series: Don't Lose Your Head 'verse [5]
Category: Bohemian Rhapsody (Movie 2018), Queen (Band)
Genre: Brian has a lot of self doubt...., Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Time, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-28
Updated: 2019-01-28
Packaged: 2019-10-18 10:03:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17578802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/somedayoneday/pseuds/somedayoneday
Summary: Deleted scene from Don't Lose Your Head, taking place between chapters 13 and 14.A look at John and Brian's (almost) first time together after the 'nothing below the belt' rule is lifted.





	Perfection

**Author's Note:**

> This is a bit short, but felt a bit too long for tumblr, so here it is! Hope you enjoy <3

Brian was nervous. He was pretty sure he was more nervous than John, which was ridiculous, really, because he’d done this a few dozen times before and John never had.

Still, it was a step farther than he’d been expecting to go this soon, and there was still a lurking worry in his gut of pushing John too far. Of hurting him, or upsetting him, and never being able to forgive himself for screwing up when John put so much trust in him to do everything right.

“Brian?” John’s soft voice shocked Brian out of his thoughts, and it occurred to him that it had been a bit rude to zone out while he was on top of John, halfway through tugging down the younger man’s trousers.

“Sorry,” Brian murmured, pressing an apologetic kiss to John’s hip and earning a shaky exhale.

“We- we don’t have to do this, if you don’t want,” John said, and it was a little weird to hear when so often it was Brian saying those exact words.

“Why d’you say that?” Brian asked, glancing up to see John propped up on his elbows so he could look down at Brian. He honestly looked lovely. Soft hair falling over his shoulders, pink nipples peaked with arousal, and tight white briefs that did nothing really to hide his obvious arousal – not that he seemed to be trying to.

“You just seem a bit… off,” John said, and he looked awfully concerned. Brian felt bad for worrying him that much. “I don’t want to- I know I said I did, but I don’t want to do this if you’re not going to enjoy it.”

Brian honestly felt awful. He’d basically promised John a hand-job – his first hand-job – and now was on the verge of backing out because it all seemed to be moving forward so quickly, and he felt a little queasy from the fear of screwing up and ruining this for John.

Brian teetered on the edge of indecision for a moment. He could do this. It wasn’t as if he’d never given a hand-job before. Sure, it was the first time with John, but he’d already done plenty with John. Sure, he’d never seen John properly naked before, but it wasn’t as if he couldn’t basically imagine it, because he’d certainly seen enough of him to form an educated guess. It wasn’t such a big step. He could do this.

He glanced up and John’s soft, trusting eyes, and his resolve collapsed. He couldn’t. His mood had been killed by nerves about ten minutes ago and it wasn’t coming back anytime soon.

“Sorry,” he huffed, shifting up on the bed to face John, though he found he couldn’t quite look him in the eye, “I’m really sorry. I just need… I need a bit more time. Maybe tomorrow.”

“Don’t apologise,” John murmured, and it sounded so genuine – especially when accompanied with the feeling of John’s arms wrapping gently around him, “It’s fine. I don’t mind waiting.”

“We’ve been waiting,” Brian pointed out, and was surprised to suddenly feel John’s lips against his own, soft and fleeting.

“Then it’s no big deal to wait a bit longer,” John replied, and then hesitated a bit before adding, “And you know… You know it doesn’t have to be perfect, right? It doesn’t- I feel like you put a lot of pressure on yourself to make everything perfect, but I don’t need it to be. I just want to do this with _you_ , that’s the important part.”

And Brian felt like a balm had been applied to the simmering worry in his chest. And he kissed John again, slow and tender.

Tomorrow, he thought. Tomorrow, they’d have another go at it – and it probably wouldn’t be perfect, but John didn’t care, so Brian didn’t either.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! And thanks for all the continued love y'all have given this 'verse <3 <3 <3
> 
> Comments and kudos are very much appreciated, as always!


End file.
